Friday, 7 September 2012

WALT:be able to add detail to our story.

                                                       AUSTRALIA

As I splashed head first into the ample metallic aqua pool, I felt the glacial vibration as my brother jumped in after me so that it was almost synchronised. There was barely anyone there, because they were all lying in bed, when they should be soaking up the sunlight! When I hopped out of the pool it was almost identical to a sauna, but then again, so is Australia!

Written by
Dominic

2 comments:

  1. Wow Dominic your choice of descriptive language has given me a very clear image of the pool and how it must have felt. Great use of verbs, adjectives and metaphor - well done.
    Mrs Angland

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  2. Domonic I really liked how you described the pool,also I liked how you used the word synchronised.Really cool story!

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